Living Unashamed

Today I was working through a new Bible study with Healing Hearts Ministries called, The Hem of His Garment: Hope for those who need healing. This study is similar to the Binding Up the Brokenhearted study, primarily based on healing from abortion. While these studies are similar, the HEM study is generically set up to help those needing healing whereas the Binding up study was set up for post-abortive individuals. I am only on week 2 of the 10-week HEM study and this short paragraph stuck out to me.

"Jesus endured the shame of the cross so that we could be free from sin and its guilt and shame (Hebrews 12:2). If we continue to be ashamed of our sin after we have confessed and repented, we are saying that Jesus' death wasn't sufficient for us. For a born-again Christian, prolonged shame can merely be the sin of pride in disguise, because you are really more concerned about your reputation than the cause of Christ."

The bolded sentence really stuck out to me. Prolonged shame can merely be the sin of pride in disguise. How many of us are living in shame because we are too prideful to admit and confess that we've messed up? I know I am guilty of that. Now, I'm not saying we should go out to every person we meet and lay it all out. I believe in discretion when confessing our sins to each other. Maybe it is a trusted friend, a pastor, a mentor, a family member, or a counselor. The point is, there can be such relief when to first go to God with our sins and then, in humility, go to those we trust and let them know what's going on. When we hold onto our sin and shame around what we've done, we allow pride to enter into our hearts.

Why pride? How is it prideful to not confess our sins? Well, to put it simply, when we hold onto our sins, we're putting ourselves before Christ. Trust me, it's not easy to come to those who care about you, those who only want what's best for you, and to say, "Hey, I've messed up again..." For me, it's always easier to confess to the Lord, to bring my sin to Him. However, when it comes to confession with fellow believers, I really struggle. I'm not sure why, maybe it's because it's quite literally face-to-face interaction in which I, in real-time, have to see and deal with their reaction. Now, if the person I am going to in confession is truly following after Christ, I should be assured that I'll get met with grace and truth. And I think maybe that's where I struggle. I don't really want to hear the truth because I already knew the truth of what I'd done and did it anyway. And let's be honest, sometimes when people come to us in truth it can feel more like a scolding than an opportunity to be vulnerable and honest with someone. Sometimes, all we're looking for is someone we can be honest with and don't have to worry about the bombarding of advice or scolding that can follow. Sometimes, we're just looking for someone to listen rather than speak back at us. I think that's why it's always easier for me to confess to the Lord. While He will convict me of my sins, I can just go to Him and be honest and He'll just listen.

When we place ourselves before God, we're more worried about how we'll look to others than how we'll look in front of God. To make a sentence much shorter, we're worried about our reputation. Let's just be really honest for a second. We've all got really crapy reputations. We all have fallen short (Romans 3:23), as we all like to say, "no one's perfect." I'll be honest, that phrase really rubs me the wrong way at times because I think sometimes we truly don't understand or remember the fact that no one, quite literally no one, except Christ, is perfect. Why do we even need to utter that phrase? I already know you're not perfect. And I already know I'm not perfect. So why bring it up? (Anyways, that was my little tangent about that) - When we're more focused on what we think others will think of us or how others will see us, we've missed the mark. Did God say it was what others think of us that will get us into heaven? Did God say it is what we do or don't do that'll get us into heaven? Did God say it's by any other perception of ourselves that'll qualify us? No. He plainly states, that it is through Christ we will have salvation and everlasting life (Ephesians 2:3-9). So quite honestly, it shouldn't really matter what others think or say. However, we as humans don't always operate that way. What others think and say is important to us, so much so that sometimes, we can be led astray. I know I can be at times and it's not always the best feeling when that happens. And that I why I am thankful we serve a loving God. Who will always be there to forgive us when we mess up.

Now, since we quite obviously know we all have crapy reputations does that excuse us to do whatever we please? No. God still calls us, as Christians, to live a holy life, to live differently and set apart from the world ( 1 Peter 2:9, Romans 12:2, Galatians 2:20, Romans 6:1-23). I think a large part of living as Christ is to live in confession with one another. When we confess, we allow fellow Christians into our lives to help hold us accountable, to encourage us, to pray for us, to love us, to extend grace, and to share in our struggles. When we open up and are vulnerable to each other about our sins, we allow something beautiful to happen. We allow for godly community to take place. We allow for humility and repentance to enter our lives and when this happens, we give the Lord full access to do His will.

Our testimony is His to share. I am living proof of that. I know myself, and I would have never wanted to share about my abortion. I wanted to keep it bottled up and locked up and never tell a soul. I tried doing that and I became depressed, my life was falling apart around me, and it was so dark for a long time. I believe God wanted me to be in the dark for a while so that when He brought me out of the darkness and into the light, I would boast in Him and not in my own works. The healing and restoration that has taken place in my life is because of Him and not through anything I've done. The desire and passion to share my story and to help others come from Him and not from my own wants. When we open up ourselves to be obedient to Him, He starts to do things with our lives that we never thought possible. I am a different person because of what Christ has done for me. And while I am still at times surprised at what the Lord is doing in me, I have been blessed by Him at every turn because of my obedience towards him. My friends, the Lord wants so much better for us, more than even we do. Today, let's be obedient to Him, and believe me, He'll change you for the better!