A Lot Can Happen In A Year.

I wasn't always big into journaling. I did it for a while in college and found a lot of relief in writing out my thoughts each night but as always, life got busy, I created excuses and eventually stopped doing it. It's been over a year now that I've been journaling. I actually started getting back into it after my ex and I broke up, I needed some way of releasing the emotions that were inside and journaling did that for me. I know journaling isn't for everyone and that's okay. Each to their own, in a godly context, of course. I should state that journaling is my favorite way of praying. I suppose it's sort of a 3-in-one kinda deal. It's how I best connect with the Lord, how I best pray, and how I can release what my day has been like, what I'm feeling, etc. I'm not really one to share my journal entries because it's a personal thing, however, today, as I was rearranging my room, I opened my bedside table drawer that houses all my journals this past year. I opened up the first one and flipped through a few pages and came across the one I had written a year ago today, June 4th, 2022.

This is one of the things I like most about journaling is that it gives you the opportunity to look back at concert evidence and see just how much you've changed, to see how much God has moved in you. Today, I want to share with you that journal entry. To be honest, I'd rather not because it's such a personal thing, and yet, this entry attests to just how much the Lord has done in my life, in just a year. And while a year can feel like such a looong time, it's really not. And I give glory to God for how much He truly has done in my life because He's radically changed my life and nothing that I could have done would have brought me to where I am now.

And so, I share with you where I was just a year ago today.

Okay, so I just did that.

I can tell you this if you would have told 22 Clara that she'd find healing from her abortion, find the Lord again and have an even stronger relationship with Him, start a blog, be given opportunities to share her testimony and have the willingness to follow the Lord wherever He called, she wouldn't have believed you. My friends, I share this very personal entry with you in hopes that you can begin to see that the Lord is always on the move! He may move at a different pace than we do, but He's always on the move. He's always working things out for His good. My friends, I share this entry with you in hopes that you can believe and trust that the Lord can and will answer your prayers. They may not always be answered in the way we hope, but He does answer and His answers are always better.

I want to point out one more important thing from this entry. On the first page, I wrote, " I pray I can continue to forgive myself and heal." I was too naive to understand it at the time of writing this but we are not capable or able to forgive ourselves. In the Bible, it doesn't say that we forgive ourselves because Christ forgave us. It says we forgive others because Christ first forgave us (Ephesians 4:32). That's an important wordage to understand. So many of us are told today that we have the power to forgive ourselves. My friends, that's a lie. Nowhere in the Bible does it say that we can forgive ourselves. It says we can forgive others but we're only able to do that because we've first been forgiven by Christ. So to those who are struggling in forgiving yourselves, let me tell you, it's not possible! You will spend the rest of your life trying to do the impossible. Only Christ can forgive you of your sins! And it took me a long time to recognize that and to allow the Lord's forgiveness over my life and sins. It's why we're told to confess our sins to God and He is faithful and just to forgive (1 John 1:9). Nowhere in that verse are we told to confess to ourselves and we'll be forgiven. We're told to bring it before God. My friends, the freedom you're looking for is only found in Christ. Go to Him today and confess and He will forgive.

It is my prayer that today the bondage of your sins will be released. That you will truly be forgiven by the only One who can forgive and that you will step into tomorrow with new strength and hope. If you're doubtful of what God can do in your life, look no further than mine. The Lord has done some radical work in me and every day I am beyond grateful and will continue to praise Him for what He's done in my life. My friends, you're not too far gone for God. He has the power to radically change you!